i returned home and began cleaning this place. i scrubbed some pretty disgusting grout, for christ's sake.
upon strolling up to the corolla to go pick oliver up, i noticed, thankfully, that my tire was flat. i called better world auto club and retreated into the cool of the condo.
then, reggie the realtor called and asked if i was ready. meaning, ready to slide down the slippery slope of having one's own home on the market for everyone to ogle. and i was like, really. we have our first guests coming at 6pm. i think. right? oh, god.
the man showed up and put a donut on my car, which sounds decliciously spectacular, but it's not. i went 40mph down nw hwy and grabbed oliver. i was pleasantly stressed at that point. a showing! woohoo!
while putting them in the car, i heard the sprinklers on our house of want (behind the school, in case i haven't mentioned it on here) sputtered to life and i was like, "oh hey! they come on in the afternoon, too!" and then i realized there was a man with a clipboard walking around in there and my heart sank straight into the subflooring of the parking lot.
a fucking inspection? was it an inspection?
i tore around the block to the front and saw two vehicles out there as well as a couple of people. the garage door was open. a woman walking through the yard looked at me and i felt violated. was she hanging out in OUR HOUSE?! oliver started crying, "why are they taking our house?!" i started crying.
we donuted to pep boys and stood in line. i had sandwiches in my purse for the kids to eat, but didn't know where i was going to take them to eat. i could see the television in the waiting room was cycling through the news on the aurora shootings which are now, i fear, dubbed eternally as "the movie theater shootings," or something equally as ridiculous sounding. i vacillated between feeling sick about the house and trying to feel glad i wasn't being shot up. but it wasn't working. really upset about the house. you see, my head moved in there ages ago and redecorated five times. it has already worked out on the patio, had ten dinner parties, run through the sprinklers, planted a garden, set up a hammock, built a picnic table, installed a washer and dryer, etc, etc, etc.
i had already texted reggie at this point to ask him to check the status. that was 3.25 hours and a follow up email ago. no response. SURPRISE. i'm considering emailing again to let him know he is killing me.
we left our tire there and the man taking it refused to put my name with it for some reason. we donuted home and the kids ate until i shoved them into beds and began cleaning again in earnest.
now i just kind of want to throw up. the booking service called again at 3:00 and said, "REALTOR would like to schedule a showing from 2:30-3:30 today." and i said, "it is 3:00 right now," and my mind's eye saw children sleeping in beds and floors not yet vacuumed. "how about 3:30-4:30?" and then my imaginary eyes saw how i'm expecting work. and i flailed and finally asked if we could do it this weekend.
hello, my new life. combined with my impeccable luck, i am expecting a solid offer to come in by tomorrow morning and then we will have nowhere to live and become penniless street urchins. oh, and remember that car i bought in february that was destroyed by hail in june? my mother told me how replacing the car with a carbon copy of itself now costs something like $1500-$2000 more than it did half a year ago. which is about the same amount i was hoping to have left over from the settlement to apply to the home-buying process.
SO CLOSE TO GETTING ON THE DONUT AND DRIVING AWAY OUT OF TOWN.