changing lives since 2003 (ms_pooka) wrote,
changing lives since 2003

cholent and king oliver.

i'm on a dare with myself today.

for the first time since the first time, i'm making cholent (from veganomicon) for dinner.

the first time i made this, i believe it was the day i found out i was pregnant with violet. the whole time i was putting everything together in the pot, i kept thinking it was the worst idea in food history. the more time i stood there chopping, the more i grew a little belligerent that someone would have the gall to make such a recipe. i couldn't even bring myself to taste it.

then we sat down to dinner.

it was the best thing i had ever had. i couldn't get enough of it. it was stupendous.

the next day, i couldn't look at it without feeling the bile rise into my throat. it sat in the fridge for a day or two before i could finally muster up the courage to grab it and toss it into the freezer.

the morning sickness began to intensify, of course. and so did my memory of the cholent. i could no longer retrieve other items from the freezer without seeing that container in there and feeling immediately sick to my stomach.

it got to where i didn't even have to see the container. i always knew it was in there. mocking me with its stomach-churning powers. going into the freezer was a nightmare.

i began begging brian to please please please remove it from the freezer and dispose of it soundly. i couldn't bear it anymore. since brian's memory is poor, this took some time and multiple beggings. i was practically near tears with want to be rid of it. i couldn't understand why he would torture me with the wantings for it to be gone.

but it still wasn't over.

i remember a visit to OKC, not long after, where i was discussing morning sickness with brian's pregnant sister-in-law. just telling her the tale of the cholent made the sickness come on. i had to stop mid-story to keep from throwing up on her kitchen floor.

and here we are. 1.25 years later. climbing back into the saddle. i thought, perhaps, i felt some of the old bile returning during prep, but it could have been a figment of my imagination.

i have taken it easy on the tarragon and caraway seed. just in case. those are the vomit makers.

two nights ago, at the dinner table, oliver was occupying himself with things other than dinner, which he likes to do, much to my dismay. he stood behind me and began twisting his fingers into my back and saying, "i'm going to screw you up!" and i gave brian one of those looks. and brian gave me one of those looks. he proceeded on to brian saying the same thing. "i'm going to screw you up!" twist twist twist. then he said, "you're screwed!"

he also has a new favorite. "you're not the boss of me!" i can only imagine this has come down to him from one of the older children in his class.

i ran into a mother in the hallway this morning who told me how cute her child thinks oliver is. she began speaking of two children (of which two i'm unsure, as i'm always riddled with confusion in the school hallway) and said they told her they like to call oliver "king oliver" and did i know what that was about and i told her about king violet and where the wild things are, but who knows if he told them that or if they came up with it on their own. in the afternoon, the two unknown children like to tell oliver that they clean up in his honor.

i wish someone would clean up in my honor and his name is king oliver.
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