changing lives since 2003 (ms_pooka) wrote,
changing lives since 2003

the pretend end of halftime employment and the cockeye.

toward the end of last week, i was finally starting to get the hang of "working half days."

i met brian at his office thursday afternoon to show off the baby and then go to babies 'r' us to pick up the crappiest pair of baby gates. they're going back. they might as well have been made out of broken popsicle sticks. and here's an example of just how narrow most of our doorways are: the gates wouldn't even fit in them on their narrowest setting. yet another reason i should avoid weighing 500 pounds.

friday, we were supposed to meet at the madras pavilion in richardson for lunch. i've been waiting something like five years to finally get myself back over there because, as i'm fond of saying, they have the mildest vegetarian buffet. but it turned out that brian's car had exploded in the parking garage, which is to say it's battery up and died. i went to pick him up for lunch and we had some super spicy vegetarian indian buffet food. so much for that. when we went back over, my never-ending parking spot good fortune cropped up again and the gigantor SUV parked next to the focus was just pulling out. so i was able to pull in alongside and let brian do a jump start. i rolled up my window and pulled out my phone so that i would be better protected and able to quickly dial 911 when brian's battery exploded in his face.

then we drove to sears auto center.

then we drove to the galleria so i could try on jeans that have all that god damned elastic mixed into the denim so that it hugs my ass in weird ways. one size 8 for shorties fit perfectly. one size 8 for shorties in a different cut was too small. the first one just looked stupid because of the odd butt-hugging. so i left angry at the world as i often do when i shop for jeans and made a vow to just wear my stupid urban commando pants for another four years non-stop. damnit.

when i returned home, i had an email from my boss asking me to work full time this week since they have a project they would like to start dialing on thursday never mind the "industry standard as far as i know" is two weeks to program plus however much time to test and train. okay. four days for everything. whatever.

saturday, we did the usual egg run at the farmer's market after leaving the little gym. but the odd fellows weren't manning their booth just yet which caused me to accidentally go into the little coffee stall across from them and spend much money on organic fair trade coffee beans.

i have few memories of saturday after that (because it was pointless) until we drove one mile down the road to attend erin and paul's housewarming event. it consisted of chasing oliver around and trying to keep him from destroying their fabulous belongings. he was called a girl a couple of times.

sunday was the day we were finally going to go to the kiddie pool. then brian spent two hours shaving epilating his back and primping and by then i felt bloated and angry about going to a pool and i threw a fit and declared we were no longer going and i now required a shower. we finally left the house at 3:00pm to make a trip to sabzi mundi or subzi mandi or sabzi mandi to look for tiffin boxes to use as take out food containers, but their's were all beaten up looking. they hated us there for being crackers more than they ever hated us over at the taj mahal imports. we got in the car and brian threw a white supreme fit.

then we drove over to taj mahal to look at their tiffin boxes. we were just about to pick one out when brian asked me for the third time if i was willing to use them in restaurants and i informed him for the third time that i would be too embarrassed at least for awhile and then i reminded him how he said he would be embarrassed, but would do it. and then he said he wasn't convinced that mining stainless steel once was any more a friend to the environment than using one thousand styrofoam boxes, 315 dozen sets of plastic utensils, and 822 plastic bags. i threw a fit in my head over why we had just made the two trips and took us on out of there.

we went to lupper at sol's in lakewood and it was all day happy hour with two $3 margaritas on our table. oliver put many toys down between the booth and the window. he is also on the verge of engagin in raspberry-making. he currently makes the kind without tongue.

this morning, i took oliver to the opthamologist because he has had the wonky eye since birth. you might have noticed in one of the 500 photos i have posted of him. i actually listed "possible wonky left eye" in the paperwork i had to fill out. i desperately wanted to put "cock eye", but that didn't really fit the condition.

we spent much time waiting in a child-friendly waiting room and two child-friendly offices. we spent a total of five minutes with the doctor. when they had me hold his hands while he was on his back getting four drops put into his eyes, i had to keep mine closed. i'm not even sure which chick put the drops in anymore because i spent so much time not looking. he clapped his "all gone" clap i've been teaching him when it was over.

we had to restrain him on my lap again for the end of the exam. of course, there's absolutely nothing wrong with his eyes other than them being set close together like a weasel or a ferret (which is a weasel, so that's redundant) and we should bring him back in a year for a follow up to his nothing-wrongedness.

i just remembered they didn't give him one of the parting gifts like two other kids had gotten. how's that fair for the little cock-eyed baby?
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