i could wear a spiderman shirt and spiderman socks and spiderman underwear...
but baby, you're already dressed. we have to hurry.: his mother replied.
as soon as they were out the door that friday morning, i felt it was safe to exit the OU room (later rechristened The Sooner Room... and good god, i can't believe i forgot to take photos) and take a shower while allowing my eyes caress a bottle of Lander brand Wacky Watermelon shampoo.
brian managed to locate a bank one branch where we were promptly told we could have visited any of their thousands of locations in order to close his father's lingering bank account. then, believe it or not, there wasn't a single starbucks to be found in any of the three quadrants of the city neighboring our location, so we went to a sandwich shop called City Bites instead. City Bites was born in the 80's and didn't bother to change with the times as evidenced by the dark pink, yellow, and blue colored walls which were partially and fancifully deconstructed atop the black and white checkered floor tiles. there was a much larger than life hand reaching out from the wall to hold an ivy close to the ceiling and a rhino had been roped off after crashing halfway through a wall. sound disconcerting? well wait until you make your first visit to the restroom. i entertained thoughts of relieving my colon in a public place until nj let me in on a little secret: the walls next to and behind the toilet were actually windows looking out into the restaurant. just because they were covered with mirrored tinting did not make me feel any more at ease. in fact, as an aberration of my bladder, i could barely coax the urine forth.
it turns out that okc has a fancy, newly-updated super small airport and we visited it to pick up victor... usher #2. after the ambiguous fire drill which sent 80% of the terminal occupants strolling hesitantly toward the exit, we located victor outside. he turned out to be a tall, dark half-cuban ken doll who confused me into thinking he's a lighting jockey for the LA porn industry. instead, it turned out he's unemployed, much like the rest of us. he also pointed out for us that the man who let out the hem of his tuxedo pants during our errand to the Men's Wearhouse reeked of reefer.
we were now well into the afternoon and i was still jonesing for my morning caffeine and as luck would have it, we stumbled upon Java Dave's after a rolling stop at the bombing memorial. we were just minutes from the church where the wedding rehearsal was about to take place. as i strolled casually down the aisle toward the alter and henceforth the bathroom, i approached brian and whispered to him that this was much how our wedding day would be. he groaned and quickly passed me by. perhaps he was disappointed that my belly wasn't swollen with his child. yes, yes. much how our wedding day would be.
we were rewarded for our vigilance with a dinner and margaritas as big as our heads at abuelo's with about 50 of the Special Couple's closest friends and family members before proceeding to the After Dinner Soiree at neighboring Tap Werks. i saw the most fabulously awfully dressed woman-girl there. i tried to convince others to snap her photo, but no one was crafty enough. suffice it to say... there was a mass of curly brown hair, a waist-length white rabbit fur jacket, embroidered black chinese styled silk pants, stiletto sandals, faded tint 70's sunglasses, and a matching attitude. i almost fainted when she took the jacket off. just because.
nj and i remained rather modest in our alcohol consumption that night. perhaps because i managed to accidentally order a $7 beer. and we even made it to bed by 12:30pm. i'm thankful since the following day would be a long one. a looong one.