i tried to linger in bed a bit longer with the hopes of falling back to slumber, but instead... after several generous hugs showered down on my kitties, i sprang from my bedsheets before the alarm ever had a chance to go off. for the fourth time, at least.
after quickly assessing my stomach situation in the bathroom mirror, i started to decide a morning workout wasn't necessary after all. it seems that George(?) has increased my metabolism and despite eating enough dinner last night to feed a hungry family of 5, i was blessed with the stomach of a 12-year-old from a time before 12-year-olds had joined the ranks of the obese. or at least when i sucked it in. and maybe leaned back a little. then i quickly recalled i have the thighs of a 250 pound woman and began reconsidering my initial plan.
as i weigh the pros and cons of a workout, i've decided to make a list of all the wonderful things Fred(?) has brought along with him in the meantime:
-the tagline i wanted to use for my xmas letter this year has come to fruition
-i can now pick up where i left off on projects begun and abandoned during Herb
-renewed impetus to sell off a couple of heaps of clothes
-i'm once again living a string of uninterrupted friday nights
-a return to the endless questions from relatives about my employment status
-staying up as late as i want
-sleeping until i'm not tired
-getting to come up with a new truck stop name for Herb's successor (george? stan? clifford!)
-i know how to crochet much better this time around than last and can surely crochet a colorful new abode before the money runs out.
-holy shit! what a brilliant idea! ... i now have an excuse to give out shoddy gifts for xmas and have decided to unravel a bit of my green scarf with its election night stink and create the ugliest pot holder ever for my mother's birthday on thanksgiving which will also, quite likely, be embroidered with her name in an awful contrasting color. hot damn!
-making multiple lj posts EVERY DAY!
-no commuting 1.5 hours a day
-no more partial existence in the mid-cities suburbs
-wearing the same pants three days in a row, but now no one will likely be the wiser
-being home to sign for packages like the ultra expensive lush xmas order
-i got to delete all my work emails and files again.
-no more pretending like i'm working for four hours a day
-a world of possibilities opening back up for me to waste them all over again
-as billie holiday croons to me from decades far worse than my own, i'm reminded i don't have to rush out and purchase a wheelbarrow to use as a wallet when i'm in line to pick up a loaf of bread
-i would say it's a chance to eat frugally and exercise maniacally and become a physical goddess... but i already know how that one turns out from last time
it's almost bizarre how easily i've reverted back to the atmospheric bubble of unemployment. last week i thought Herb seemed like a million years ago. today, it seems like he never left.
as i ponder the possibility of another beans-and-rice existence, i wish i could go back in time and purchase those economy jugs of irish cream and buttershots without financial guilt. punishment for my immense capacity to be lazy i suppose.
welcome back to my unemployment. it's going to be another wordy one. perhaps it's not too late to join nanowrimo as an alternative outlet for my rambling sentences.
and so it begins...