changing lives since 2003 (ms_pooka) wrote,
changing lives since 2003
ms_pooka

the aural version of chinese water torture.

monday morning, as i prepared myself to greet the day, my smoke detector began to beep periodically. oh shit. my apartment is a wreck and i simply cannot allow a maintenance technician to enter with it in such tragic disarray. not to mention, i am not head over heels in love with the idea of going through a second time what i went through when this happened last february. i wasn't having it.

i failed at an attempt to press the button with an extended tape measure while standing on my bed, but it was just too far away. it's probably for the best. perhaps pressing the button would further engage the unwanted behavior. i chose to ignore the beeping and went on my merry way to work, leaving the cats to fend off insanity on their own.

i had many moments of anxiety throughout the day that i would return to periodic beeping or, worse yet, a continuous tone as the batteries grew closer and closer to their moment of expiration. yet upon opening my door at the end of the day, there was nothing but silence and the gentle voices of "alternative rock" dj's wafting from the stereo speakers.

success! i had made the right decision and the baby jesus had rewarded me for it. i prefer to take my chances living with an inert smoke detector than to go through the nightmare of replacing the battery at the possible expense of my useless antiques and my sanity.

tuesday morning, as i prepared myself to greet the day, my smoke detector began to beep periodically. oh well. apparently it has reverence for my sleeping patterns and chooses to alert me to its waning condition only during the daytime hours. i can live with that and now feel confident this can not go on much longer. i ignore the visible strain appearing on oskar's face and traipse out the door, hoping that none of my neighbors will be reporting the beep to maintenance. upon opening my door at the end of the day, there was nothing but silence and the gentle voices of "alternative rock" dj's wafting from the stereo speakers. the sanity of the felines appeared to be intact.

wednesday morning, at the time of 4:29am, my smoke detector began to beep periodically. apparently, due to the degradation of the battery cells, the courteous internal clock had lost its ability to keep time with my natural biorhythms. despite my mild fear of suffocation, i tried my father's old trick of covering my head with a pillow. it's amazing how thoroughly a nice, sharp BEEP can rouse one from slumber... especially when it is accompanied from a dream email sent by a dream co-worker alerting you to the fact that you are about to hear a BEEP.

wednesday morning, at the time of 5:30am, i gave up the idea of continued slumber and decided to get a jump on tidying up... just in case i was forced to throw in the towel at some point. by now, ttyki was cowering in the small space by the entrance to the litterbox in hopes that close proximity to the stinky lines could somehow battle the sound waves. it amazed me how i was able to go from cringing at every BEEP to thinking it must have stopped (when it hadn't). i have fantastic hypothalamitic powers.

please let it stop.
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